to prove herself worthy of not only her husband but also his family. No parents would want to accept their daughters back after the marriage who fail to abide by the culture because the same culture would be prevailing in their families too. To them it is the cultural values which count more than the religious values where they conflict and they always do. Mother's possessiveness, sharpened after the son's marriage, is part of the culture.

Culture of Taboos.
It is no wonder if it is taboo for the daughter-in-law to mention her husband by his name or refer to him as "her husband" in a possessive term in a conversation with her mother-in-law. She will respectfully mention him as "your son", as an admission that the mother's share of her son rests larger and ranks higher than the daughter-in- law's share of him as her husband. It is in the interest of the daughter-in-law to avoid mentioning how loving "her son" is to her. That would mean a covert encroachment over the mother's share.

In fact any let-up in the degrees in which the culture is followed at present in an enlightened society on the contrary is considered as a relaxation in the cultural discipline in favour of the daughter-in-law especially when it comes to enjoying a conjugal life. The culture had or has perhaps even now more "teeth", otherwise called "ethics and values", in the rural society in India and Pakistan. The victims are not only the daughters in law but also the sons, both in millions across the subcontinent.

The daughters-in-law in an extended family in a rural society are required to remain in a constant company of their mother-in-law during the day time while engaged in the domestic chores or farm and dairy work or even while taking short rest napping. It is considered highly disrespectful for a daughter-in-law to offer a smile to her husband in manifestation of love or a signal of a yearning for his company -in the presence of the parents-in-law.

Fake Headache.
There were times when it was considered indecent for sons in a family to share the same room each with their respective wives every night when retiring for the night. The adult females slept together with their children separately from the adult group of male members in the family. However, it would rest upon one of the sons, in turn, who would discreetly fake a convenient headache now and then before retiring for the night and request the mother for "her daughter-in-Iaw" to attend to him. Of course, the mother knows and accepts the situation, perhaps grudgingly.

Of course, but for the loyalty to the culture which transcends the religious values. no marriage could survive this cultural intimidation, but then divorce too was contrived smartly as unthinkable within the ambit of the same culture to ensure the blind loyalty to the culture to the end.